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I am so sick of this fucking bullshit

I don't know if I can even watch Dortmund anymore.

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Christian Pulisic Misses Salzburg Match with Non-Terminal Illness

Dortmund rolled into Salzburg today to compete for a spot in the Europa League Round of 8 conspicuously absent one key player. Looks like Pulisic has flu and Toprak is out with a muscle problem #BVB #FCSBVB https://t.co/9bJfnfO7si — BVB Buzz (@BVBBuzz) March 15, 2018 Christian Pulisic apparently has the flu, which I don't believe, since I don't believe Christian Pulisic gets sick. I mean, Michael Jordan played through the flu before, and I'm not comparing CP to Michael Jordan, but the kid can dunk.  Pulisic: People doubt me, but I can dunk! https://t.co/I8oSqWO7M3 !?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter pic.twitter.com/WSMKf5kZcs — Dave Masters (@davemasters) January 11, 2018 (I dunked once in warm-ups before a rec league basketball game in high school. It was the only time I ever dunked in my illustrious basketball career. Most of the other times I stuck to left-handed layups.) Dortmund played the opposite of good today, which, unless my English fai...
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A Letter to Allah or Jesus Concerning Christian Pulisic

It's been a long time since I posted anything. The reason for this is because I moved to Guadalajara, Mexico, and things have been kind of weird. I'm barely surviving. I'm teaching English classes for a painfully low amount. And I don't really know how it's going to change in the next few days, though I know something needs to change. BUT JESUS FUCKING SHIT, ENOUGH ABOUT ME, LET'S TALK ABOUT CHRISTIAN FUCKING PULISIC. So, I never talked about this "dunk": Don't forget, Christian Pulisic is 5'8" 😳 (via @cpulisic_10 ) pic.twitter.com/FfQw1kWOGP — Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) January 2, 2018 And the reason I didn't talk about it is because I don't really care. But one thing I will say is that I don't really believe it. Which is a little bit crazy, since Pulisic confirmed in a video the other day that the rim was indeed 10 feet. That's the part I don't really believe. Because it doesn't look like he j...
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Christian Pulisic injury and the real reason he's so good

Apparently Christian Pulisic is injured. Which I find interesting, because how can you injure someone whose flesh and blood are not of this world? To injure Christian Pulisic you'd have to touch him, and I've seen what happens when defenders try to touch Christian Pulisic. Generally the ball goes through their legs or they fall down or, in the rare cases when they do lay a by comparison leprous arm on him, they concede some kind of free kick in a dangerous era. So I don't know about this supposed shin injury. And if he is injured, I doubt it happened on the pitch. I bet Isak was playing a prank on him or something like that. Maybe Aubameyang. But I'd bet dollars to proverbial donuts he's not actually injured. His presence was of course missed on the field against Wolfsburg yesterday, though his replacement, Jadon Sancho, killed it. I didn't know Jadon Sancho was that good. I'd seen him his first time on the field, but that was only a few minutes. I sinc...
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